Several terms are associated with violent behavior, such as aggressiveness, aggression, and violence.
Aggression is a natural human trait and is acceptable as long as it does not occur at the expense of others. When we fail to control our own aggression, we behave violently. We use force against another person (or against ourselves) and thereby cause harm. Violence can be physical, psychological, sexual, economic, or social, and even the threat of its use is considered violence.
In situations where a person pushes their opinion through inappropriate means, they simultaneously endanger good relationships with those close to them.
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The boundary of what is normal
Defining the boundary of what is and is not normal in a relationship is quite complex. There is no dogma by which a partnership can be characterized as trouble-free or, on the contrary, pathological. However, we do have certain indicators that can serve as inspiration for identifying a violent relationship.
Partner’s privacy
Open relationship: respect for the partner’s privacy.
Problematic relationship: lack of respect for the partner’s privacy.
Violent relationship: deliberate destruction of and prohibition of privacy.
Expectations of the relationship
Open relationship: expectations are realistic, do not place impossible demands, and are created together.
Problematic relationship: expectations are in some respects practically impossible to meet.
Violent relationship: absurd and unattainable expectations are accompanied by subsequent punishment.
Space for expressing positive and negative feelings
Open relationship: a safe space.
Problematic relationship: a narrowed and limited space.
Violent relationship: a dangerous or threatening space, where punishment for expressing emotions is possible.
Authenticity / genuineness of behavior
Open relationship: I can remain myself.
Problematic relationship: I choose when I can be myself; sometimes I cannot, because I am afraid of rejection or abandonment by my partner.
Violent relationship: I am not allowed to be myself, because my partner does not want it and an act of violence would follow.
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